frustration

I am SERIOUSLY the worst girl ever....
This morning was a frustrating exercise in trying to find shoes to wear to ARnie and Becky's wedding that match the dress that my hubby picked out (mainly because i am incompetant with picking out any kind of dress other then a plain BLACK dress.). I found an "ok" set of shoes last night and bought then. However, i felt like i had to give DSW a chance.
Now, buying shoes for me has become an increasingly trecherous event as i have gotten older. It seems that with each of my 3 ankle surgeries, my left ankle/foot has morphed into a non-foot shaped object that fits into only aobut 1 percent of shoes out there. So not only was i looking for shoes to match my brown/gold dress (ad brown is totalyl out of season right now), i was lookign for shoes that a) FIT my mishapen foot and b) i could actually ambulate in.

Needless to say, i almost lost it in DSW. When i get frustrated, i pretty much get a "fuck you" attitude. If someone was in my brain (or trailing behind me, because im almost positive i was talking outloud to myself), this is what you would have heard:

- Fuck you Thais for having no sense of fashion and being a crappy girl
- Fuck you MArco for growing up with 4 woman and therefore being so good at picking out all of my clothing and thus rendering me out of practice for even attempting to be somewhat stylish
- Fuck you ankle doctor for my non-pretty, scarred up ankle
- Fuck you ankle for being such an assshole
- FUck you bunk bed at Drum Major academy for being so fucking high up
- Fuck you Lafeyette College for putting us in dorms that only had bunk beds
- Fuck you stupid ER doctors taht misdiagnosed my torn ligaments as a minor sprain, thus having me walk on torn ligaments for 3 months
- Fuck you trampoline for fucking up my fucking left ankle for the rest of my fucking life


soooo, basically at the end of my subconscious temper tantrum/schizophrenic break, i came to the conclusions that trampolines are the reason i am inept at picking out shoes....the moral of hte story is NEVER buy your child or let them use a trampoline.

This wasnt the end of my DsW experience. I went to look at hand bags for this dress as well. Now, most "girls" wuld look for a hand bag that would fit their lipstick, mascara, various feminine objects, compact....No, all iwas thinking was "hmmm..... will that bag fit my inhaler?"
Needless to say, i wound up NOT getting a clutch and decided that i will leave my inhaler in the car :)

In conclusion, I really am a crappy girl. I have only cooked 2 times in all of 2009, and have only worn make-up 2 times in 2009 ( i will be wearing make up this weekend, so i geuss this means i have to cook 2m ore meals....hmmmm). But, this is me, and my poor husband is stuck with me!

so i am kind of addicted to the "house hunters" show on HGTV...i just love seeing differnt kind of houses. However, i find myself getting pissed when i see how much people are paying for these houses. I know that you pay a premium for lving in NJ....and i wouldnt live any where else. where else can you get to the city, mountains or beach with in one hour of your house? We have awesome places to eat, good health care, and zany people.
Tonight they were in New Mexico. Let me just say i would NEVER live there...every house and neighborhood was overwelmingly brown and burnt looking...actaully the house the people wound up buying came with 3/4 of acres of sand/dirt with it....very barren....
however, they bought a house for 244,000 dollars with 3000 square feet....and 3/4 acres (of dirt)......on a cul-de-sac....grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr......i paid more then that for my 1000 square foot house on a 60 by 100 lot......and to top it off, they were bitching about the price!!!!!!
anyway, i am hoping to catch one in an expensive area, like California or New York City so i can re-gain my pride and composure!

My post for today

Ok, so here is my boring breakdown/thoughts for today:

- I had not one, but two, grossly inappropriate patients today. The first guy is basically dying (sadly); however, his daughter insists that he needs 3 hours of therapy a day AND should go to rehab. First of all, we are an acute care hospital...if you get 1/2 hour every other day, you are freakin' lucky. Second of all, this dude is dying - he has end stage cancer, cant breathe and his HR wont stay below 120,even at rest. He is a Code Blue waiting to happen. This poor guy cant even really talk anymore because he is so short of breathe; yet his daughter INSISTS he needs to be basically tortured with OT/PT....people like this need to be shot.
My second lady basically screamed the ENTIRE time we attempted to treat her....she has a old SEVERE CVA, a pelvic fracture and a hip fracture. The MD order says "Please get patient OOB and Ambulate." WE couldnt even do range of motion in bed with out her screaming bloody murder! PT/OT at this point is POINT LESS!! Me doing 10sets of shoulder flexion is NOT going to get this lady up and walking any time soon....Poor lady!
- One of my eating disorder clients said to me today "You know how it is when you just cant stop exercising?"....now, i know this is a therapeutic environment, but do I LOOK LIKE I KNOW HOW IT IS TO OBSESSIVELY EXERCISE?!?!?!?!? so hilarious!!!
- I hate when people try to do sneaky things....and they dont get the point of why you were upset in the first place....whatever
- I love my dogs....they rule. Its so nice to come home from a long day at work and just have two bundles of fur be so happy to see you....its an instant pick-me-up!